If you're here, you either came out of your own curiosity, or someone sent you here to learn more about Chastity.
What is Chastity?
Chastity is the process of one partner having their access to sexual pleasure denied in some way, either through a physical device, a set of rules in a BDSM relationship, temporarily through role-play, or the act of abstaining from sexual contact for various reasons.
To many, chastity is a fetish and/or lifestyle that is gaining popularity quickly as people become more open with their sexuality. The goal of this website is to help educate adults in this context.
For the purposes of education, we will use two people in a relationship for this example. The Dominant (D) and the Submissive (s). One can participate in chastity with one or more partners, or one can play by themselves (solo-play).
How Do People "Do" Chastity?
In chastity-play, there is a power exchange where the submissive (will hereby be known as lower-case s) submits to the Dominant (will hereby be known as upper-case ) by surrendering all rights to sexual pleasure as a means of submitting themselves. This exchange may be a temporary arrangement such as several hours, a moderate arrangement such as 1-3 days or even up to several weeks, or a long-term arrangement such as one month all the way up to indefinite denial of sexual pleasure. It is important that all participants have an open and respectful conversation to outline limits, a safe-word, expectations and understandings to establish an environment of trust and safety. Trust and safety are the most important aspects of any relationship.
Once all participants have communicated and have agreed to all of the above boundaries, the submissive, s, agrees to surrender his or her access to their own genitals either via an agreement or via a physical device.
If the agreement is made instead of a physical device, the submissive is only allowed sexual pleasure and/or orgasm when the Dominant grants permission.
If a physical device is used, the submissive wears a plastic or metal device often accompanied by a lock and key, and the key is given to the Dominant. The only way the submissive can actually escape the device is if the Dominant gives the key back to the submissive.
Why Do People Like This?
The attraction to chastity among partner is often the rush of being trapped at the mercy of a Dominant. The submissive often receives mental sexual stimulation from this arrangement, and the dominant often receives both mental and physical sexual pleasure. The power exchange established from this relationship is what attracts many partners to this play.
Chastity was historically used to keep women from having pre-marital sex, which back in the day made them seem "unpure" in the eyes of many religions and traditional beliefs, but due to modern liberation of sexuality, these accusations of pre-marital sex have been lessened by society as a whole. It seems this act from the past has surfaced into modern day practicing of sexuality, much like other areas of BDSM.
Today, chastity is used mostly for sexual exploration, fetish-based play, and a key element of some BDSM relationships. More often than not, it is often a male submissive submitting to a female or male Dominant.
Is Chastity Safe?
Yes! As long as you take some common-sense precautions, you can safely participate in chastity play either by yourself or with others. Chastity toys have evolved a lot over time, and some actually claim to be in permanent chastity!